negative

this morning i went in for the blood test to tell if i was pregnant, a little over two weeks after our IUI attempt. they told me they could tell definitively at this point, one way or another. i went in early this morning, somehow managed to waste five and a half hours until i could call for the results, and then was told that it came back negative.

i wasn't surprised, i guess... i didn't really have a hunch one way or another. the hormones have totally whacked out my body, so i don't even feel premenstrual. but i was definitely disappointed, and a little anxious as i realize that this is one step closer to us running out of options. but mostly i didn't have as much of a reaction as i thought i might. maybe i've just psyched myself out so badly over this that i can't react properly. hours later i'm still a little numb about it, and just trying to look ahead to the next step: another IUI cycle.

i'd been using the progesterone suppositories all along as i'd been instructed, which would have prevented me from getting my period regardless. so the nurse told me to stop them today, wait for my period, and then call them to set up my appointments to get things rolling again. apparently it takes a week for some women to get their period after stopping the progesterone... i really hope that isn't the case with me. i want to keep things moving. as it is we will barely squeeze in a second cycle of IUI before school starts. although it does sound lovely to not be taking any hormones for a few days. i've been sick to my stomach from the progesterone almost every day, not to mention being grossed out and annoyed by the discharge and vaginal swelling they cause. i could use a reprieve from all of that.

so... that's all there is to report. still can't drink alcohol or coffee on account of the other meds i'm still taking; i made the mistake of getting a latte to cheer myself up this afternoon and paid for it with crazy nausea and diarrhea tonight. sigh. but i suppose i will find other ways to distract myself until we begin again. ever onward!