i got my period today. no surprise there, really. we did an okay job trying on our own this cycle, but life has been quite busy and my body has been readjusting to life off of the hormones -- i wasn't exactly sure when i ovulated so we just kind of guessed. turns out that my cycle was on the longer side so i probably ovulated later than i thought. but -- it's ok. i wasn't feeling like it was going to happen during that cycle. but that wasn't coming from a pessimistic place... i am still feeling really good about things.
i went back to the doctor last week so that they could check on the cyst in my ovary and it was completely gone. the doctor said that everything looked great and that if i wanted we could try another IVF cycle. but i told her that we were happy taking a break until after the holidays. and i wasn't disappointed at all. she totally understood and thought it was a good idea to enjoy the holidays and continue taking a breather from the hormones. she told me to call her when/if i got my period so we could try to estimate when i should come in to see about getting things going in january. and before i left, she said, "i just have to tell you... i know this is going to happen for you. i do some ultrasounds and i can see how difficult it will be for some women... but you have beautiful ovaries. so don't give up hope." i guess, coming from a reproductive endocrinologist, being told you have beautiful ovaries is about the highest compliment one can receive. i was thankful for her optimism, and i know she wouldn't have said that if she didn't really mean it.
and i'm optimistic, too. not just about the possibility of trying IVF again in the new year, but even about this new cycle that will play out over the next few weeks. i'm on my winter break and have tons of leisure time and little fun getaway time over the next two weeks. thus, sex will be easily "scheduled" and hopefully plentiful. and my body still feels really good. i didn't have any pms at all. no cramps, no headache. my acupuncturist was so excited to look at my basal body temp chart it was as if i'd given him a holiday gift (which i probably should next week... i am so thankful for all he's done). he said my temps are indicative of a very healthy cycle. this chart looks completely different than the jagged ups and downs of the years i charted before. we have every reason to be optimistic. and we are.
the winter solstice is days away -- the only winter holiday i really celebrate anymore. it's a time of hope and new beginnings: the longest night before the slow return of spring and life renewed. it's perfect timing for me to ovulate and for my quiet time with the hubby. and while i can't possibly know what the new season or the new year will hold for us, i have a feeling that i'm moving closer to my dream of starting a family. and that is a really good feeling.
